Sunday, October 15, 2017


Finally the season begins to turn. The Air Conditioners have become less and less, the heaters haven't turned on just yet. I am ever so grateful for the joy of sweaters and scarves, and I continue to visit my favorite place in all of New York. Work continues to be unpredictable and I often wonder if I'll ever just find my rhythm here. But we breathe, we prep food on Sunday, we take one step at a time. And we talk in the Royal "We"... apparently.

Sunday, August 13, 2017

Summer Blues

 I discovered that it only takes 30 minutes to get to Coney Island from my apartment. It takes longer to get to the library or Prospect Park... so today in my deep dark funk I went for the second time in two days. I may go again tomorrow. Yesterday it was grey and humid and gross but the beach was semi-free of people. Today it was sunny and beautiful and people littered the beach. That's the thing about New York. There's nowhere to go and be quiet. The most quiet place is my apartment but I don't want to sit at home all day, so I go out and try to find a place that is less noisy. I tried walking to Manhattan Beach and found mansions on the way and another beach even more packed with people. I took a moment to sit in the grass at a church. I was sure a security guard would make me leave but no one bothered me. I walked back to Brighton Beach and along the shore until the sun started to set and people started to leave, finally a patch of sand that wasn't jammed with people opened up. I just sat and watched the waves. I tried to not think about how noisy everything is and how plans don't seem to work out. I just tried to not think about the racists taking over the country and the megalomaniacs running the country and how any day I'm just going to see a flash of light and a loud noise and everything will be different. Just watch the waves. Just keep breathing.

Friday, June 30, 2017

Rainy day

I found myself on my commute home today admiring how beautiful everything gets in the rain. So sad that my phone doesn't have better resolution, I moaned about how overexposed everything was. Meanwhile, on my left hip was sitting my fancy Nikon SLR just being ignored. I had brought it to work for a quick portrait session and promptly forgot that I was hauling it along with all of my other possessions when it hit me; I am an idiot. I am carrying the perfect camera to capture these dewy leaves, I'm just so used to having the convenience of a phone that I forgot about the awesome power of a tool designed to do one thing very well.

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Be Skeptical

It has now been a full year since I've received my MFA. I went to the showcase for the class of 2017 last week.
Although he has a hard time getting around these days our dear professor Ming Cho Lee actually showed up to see the work. He uses a walker, stairs are difficult, but he still loves talking about theatre.  At the end of the day, we gathered to toast the graduates and Ming was coerced into giving a toast which he began “I have some concerns…”  Classic Ming. His concerns were mostly that everyone thinks too much and feels too little ; “Stop being so goddamned pragmatic and start finding the romanticism in these stories”.  He also touched on our current political situation. A man who escaped Communist China and lived through the Great Depression and WWII has perspective on this trend of nationalism and choosing sides. On that topic he told us to be wary of concepts, to not easily align ourselves with any one idea. He said “be skeptical, have a sense of irony” I miss that man. Some people aren’t patient enough to hear what he’s saying but I am ever grateful that I got to study with him.  

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Best Seller

I write you from a time that I still could. I've read enough of the dystopian future to know this too will possibly get shut down. Freedom of press, freedom of speech, freedom in general is about to go underground. Today George Orwell's novel 1984 became a #1 best seller. Everyone wants to be prepared for the propaganda machine. For the double talk (Newspeak in the novel), for the authorities to tell us to deny the things we see with our eyes. This dystopian present is for the birds though. If I had my choice of fiction to live in it would be the Star Trek one where we've all learned to get along and are exploring space having philosophical discussions about interfering in under-developed cultures... sadly here we are. Hey Big Brother... here's my blog.