A sewing question?

There is a question I hear all the time... the question really is "would you sew this thing for me because I have no idea of what I am doing?"  Unfortunately this question usually is posed as a series of circuitous questions that make me crazy.
Example; "I was wondering about this cute skirt I bought... I'd just a wee bit small and I was wondering if it would be possible to make it bigger..."  
To which I answer " I suppose it would depend on if there is any seam allowance inside"
Although really the person asking wants me to say "I don't know, perhaps you should bring this glorious skirt in so that I can sew it for you!"
 Inevitably the  answer I give is followed up by something like " I just don't know how you do it... I have a hard time with buttons"

Which reinforces the fact that a simple alteration like letting seams out would be far beyond the asker's scope... Why ask stupid questions like this?  Do you go up to your plumber and ask "gee, I'm thinking about installing a new sink in my bathroom but I just don't know how to make the water go through the pipes..." or do you mention to your chiropractor friend that you're thinking about readjusting your spine but can't quite figure out which vertebrae to crack...? 

Tip #1; just because your grandmother could do this task does not mean it is easy. Don't act like it's something you can just pick up if you only had five minutes and the slightest desire to.  It is insulting to me and to your grandmother and you know it's not true... go practice sewing some buttons.

I just want to tell those who seem to think that I live to sew things and am dying to help with all sewing related problems, that in fact this is how I make my living.  I am a highly trained specialist and it has taken me over ten years to be able to sew as well as I do.   Sure I'll explain to you exactly how to alter whatever you want... but don't expect me to take pity on you because you're clueless and cheap.  If you want me to sew something, just ask me.  I suggest you bribe me with money, food or whiskey... possibly all three.  Even with the lack of money, food, or whiskey I think that someone just asking for help is better than them hoping to entice me to volunteer... it just irritates me to no end.