postcards

What is wrong with me!?

2012-01-22T02:17:00.000-08:00

Perhaps this is why I am single... I see this amazingly beautiful painting with sweeping romantic motion and a breathtaking sunset in it and yet this is what I see;

Mars

2012-01-22T01:10:00.000-08:00

"The red world and the blue are brothers. They were born together in the seething maelstrom of dust and gas spinning out from the heart of the vast cloud that was to become Father Sun.

For uncountable time each world was engulfed in endless violence. Monsters roared down out of the sky, pounding the worlds mercilessly in a holocaust of terrible explosions. Under such awesome bombardment there could be no solid ground; the rocks themselves were liquid bubbling magma as the fiery rain from the sky went on and on, blotting out the radiance of the newly bright Father Sun with steaming clouds that covered each world from pole to pole"

--Ben Bova, Mars

Are you in love yet? I am only half way through this novel (the first Ben Bova I have read). It is slow, methodic and about as close to Pablo Neruda I have seen in the English language. It's one of those books that I can read a paragraph like the one above and I want to look up and find someone to share it with so that I can ask; "did you see that!?" It's this pulsing story that makes you wonder what is going to happen next, it makes you curse the fact that the book must be put down to sleep or to work or other such mundane things. So I guess the point of this post is... I recommend this book.

Cold Sleep.

2012-01-17T02:42:00.000-08:00

I cannot sleep in the cold. Last night the power went out around 2am because our wiring is crappy and my housemate and I both had our space heaters on. Unfortunately the breaker box is in his closet and I didn't want to creep into his room in the black of night to try and regain electricity.

I had horrible disturbing dreams, the kind I cannot recount here (knowing they were fictional) they were too gut wrenching to even talk about. I woke feeling like I had been beaten up throughout the night, cold and heartbroken. It was clearly a shallow sleep, possibly no deep sleep whatsoever. Tonight I left the heater off for fear I would have to go without the electric blanket and be faced with another fight with night terrors.

I am officially adding "electric blanket" to my list of "Why living in the present is better than any time in the past". It's right up there with indoor plumbing, hot showers, women's liberation and electric washing machines.
Seriously.

New Eyes

2012-01-11T02:48:00.000-08:00

I am in love with my new camera... it seems like it can make anything look luscious.
Hello concrete wall, water pipe, safety pin bin...

I know, it's a little crazy.

dog. play. now.

2012-01-08T23:02:00.000-08:00

This afternoon I had a Kraft grilled cheese sandwich and a four hour nap.

My head is full of phlegm.

If I had a cat, he would want to sit on my chest and purr until I fell asleep.

However, this dog seems to lack all empathy.

He feels the need to push his ball into my face. He wants to PLAY... as much fun as napping was, now that time is over and it is play time! Let's go on a WALK!

meh.

Photo Day.

2012-01-07T12:01:00.000-08:00

The day began at 4:15am after all of maybe 3 hours of mostly restless sleep.
Grumble grumble, hit the On button. Coffee Please.
5am drive to East Oakland. Pack car
6:30 hello Birkenstock office... Novato, where am I?

Yesterday I assisted on a photo shoot. It started early. So early that throughout the year I see 4am as a bed time more than a wake up time. Oh my heck it was early... and oh my heck I could not get to bed before midnight, or stay asleep... so let's just say I was a little blurry for a good chunk of the day.

The Birkenstock offices are beautiful. They're in a renovated Air Force hangar, high ceilings, pretty 'natural' furnishings, lots of windows and comfy chairs, tables and tables full of product (shoes)... although really all you need to know about the Birkenstock offices is that the walls are fuzzy. They wallpapered with some kind of suede material, if I worked there I would probably pet a bald spot in my wall.

I helped dress models and clip price tags, I hauled heavy bags... we set up on top of a hill in Novato before sunrise hoping to get a shot of our models running as the light crept up above the horizon. Instead we were greeted with fog. The foggiest soup you can imagine slowly turned the world bright white as the light emerged. Hopefully the photographers got some cool shots even if they weren't the shots they were hoping for.

We had several set ups, lunch around 2pm (my dry and probably not the best sandwich tasted AMAZING by then) and relocated to catch the sun as it fell down the other side of the Earth.

As the sun set, barn owls began their hunt for small creatures. One skimmed right past us, looped the loop and plunged down on the other side of the bushes to catch a rodent on its last day. After ten hours of photography and on minimal sleep, the introduction of hunting owls was rather similar to bringing a dog into a second grade class room. Somehow the stalwart photographer managed to keep on task as the light crept away to nothing and our attention spans with it.

All in all, it was a tiring but good day. The Corporate types, the photography team and the loveliest models imaginable all made the process enjoyable and painless. I think I could do this again.

More sleep before the day would be helpful I think...

Zombi-pocalypse

2012-01-03T23:32:00.001-08:00

This is what Trader Joe's looks like after all surrounding non-Safeway grocery stores have been closed for two days. Somehow I scored the last two bell peppers in the store.

On a side note; Hey Mom & Dad, I can't find my little green camera, have you seen it? Now I've either got my phone (fine quality seen above) or my Nikon (a wee bit bulky to keep in my purse)... check my room?

Google humor...

2012-01-02T22:01:00.000-08:00

Forgive my lack of actual photos these days... I'll get back to it soon...

Happy New Year!

2011-12-31T20:17:00.000-08:00

Settlers of the Tate house...

2011-12-29T00:30:00.000-08:00

Game night in Idyllwild, I get the rare joy to visit with people I usually only see online... and look at these beautiful people;

The Game;

Pretty Sarah;

John & Lisa

I couldn't get any good shots of Josh, but I did get the castle he was building...

Yea, I like these people.

Gross cake

2011-12-20T22:20:00.001-08:00

Oh nasty store cake.

People eat you on birthdays...

but then you still look like this three weeks later.

The past in abstract.

2011-12-20T00:53:00.000-08:00

Anyone want to guess what I was taking photos of?

Sewing terms

2011-12-12T00:53:00.000-08:00

Dear everyone in the world,
I've got a couple of semantic details I'd like to clear up;
There is no way yet invented to fully automate sewing clothing. This means that absolutely everything that you wear was HAND MADE.

If you have something that was made for you, unless it was made by a member of the Chambre Syndicale de la Haute Couture, it is Custom Made, not 'Haute Couture'.

Saying that something is 'Couture' is implying that it is Haute Couture, but the term has been bastardized so much that Websters will now allow the use of 'couture' to mean custom made.

k... that's all, thanks so much.

Love Al'xae

Christmas Music

2011-12-07T00:20:00.000-08:00

The one thing I really need... to get through the Christmas season, off tune, insincere "I just made this Christmas album because my agent said I should" crap ... are my headphones.

This is what I am playing to drown out the Jingle Bells.

I am enthralled with Gogol Bordello.

San Francisco in the Golden hour.

2011-11-27T02:25:00.000-08:00

When the sun sets on a crisp San Francisco day,

it stops to embrace the city as it leaves the world to the night.

The golds and greens of the painted ladies

embrace the sky in rounded eyes.

Light shimmers into the coming fog as the sun trips into the Pacific.

Plans.

2011-11-27T02:06:00.000-08:00

We did Thanksgiving at my place this year! It was so much fun, I had to share our "planning" chart...

Yes, we are a bit crazy.

(sorry words are sparse... Nutcracker and Winter shows have eaten my brains... so BUSY!)

Doctor, I'm thinking about starting a new excercise regime...

2011-11-19T00:23:00.000-08:00

Really, just read this.

Just in case you thought your eyes went all crazy, here let me make that last part larger.

(I found this on my tea box.)

Production Values!!!

2011-11-10T12:28:00.000-08:00

Dear Everyone;
When you pull the flag, shirt, or curtains out of the box, Please find an iron. I cannot pay attention to anything you are saying otherwise.

Thanks,
Me

p.s. Yes Mom & Dad, I'm looking at your curtains too... it makes me nuts.

Occupy

2011-11-03T22:53:00.000-07:00

I am including this web news clip here because the main stream media is skewing what is going on in the Bay Area, this seems fairly well balanced;

Occupy Berkeley is pretty much a few dozen people camping out downtown, with no threats of police action or evction, I had a chat with a few of the occupiers yesterday.

Occupy San Francisco is (by my estimation) a couple hundred people camped out by the Ferry Building, and the police have been pretty chill about that as well, I haven't stopped there but drive past it on my way to one of my theatre jobs.

Oakland is not burning down. The police haven't been dealing with the situation very well and there is a group of jerks that every protester I know is trying to figure out how to stop because these miscreants aren't helping the cause, but Oakland is clearly the Occupy to keep your eyes on at the moment.

The general strike yesterday was huge and peaceful, and the vandalism didn't happen until late at night. So there you go... it's not as bad as the television says, and it's not just a big drum circle full of hippies, there is the full spectrum representing. More info as it unfolds, but don't trust the television completely, they are peddling entertainment more than they should.

when good ideas go bad...

2011-11-02T00:18:00.000-07:00

Whenever I see something like this it makes me pause to think about how many design meetings went by...

and no-one thought to ask;

"Hey guys, don't you think the disembodied hands lifting kids' shirts and skirts is a little... molest-y?"

(This window wasn't the worst I saw either.)

Um...

2011-10-19T11:05:00.000-07:00

Should I be worried about how many fictional history books are included in this search?

40 years...

2011-10-16T00:00:00.000-07:00

and my parents still seem to like each other...

At their wedding my Mom wore a sweet empire cut dress with a pink and lace vest (for the reception) and my Pop wore a ruffled powder blue shirt (with extra ruffles) and this swank plaid suit coat (bell bottomed pants were not saved for us posterity)...
Happy Anniversary (a month ago)!

Sunset in San Francisco tonight was like this.

2011-10-15T23:16:00.000-07:00

Scents

2011-10-12T23:53:00.000-07:00

Idyllwild smells like cedar, pine and vanilla crushed under your feet.
New York City, in the summer smells like thunder and sweat, in the spring it smells like cinnamon.
Berlin has this odd mix of spices I cannot name, but it is oddly savory.
London smelled of wet concrete and brick.
The redwood forest smells like petrichor even when it hasn't been raining.
Monterey smells like salt water, fish, pine, and funnel cakes.

Berkeley must smell like something but I can't tell. My nostrils refuse to clear. They have shut tight so that I can only detect the strongest of smells through a perpetual allergy induced sense blindness. This season seems to be worse than ever and frustration is building.

The Best? FIre?

2011-10-08T23:44:00.000-07:00

This is my favorite building in my neighborhood... It is the Best? Fire Equipment.

Makes me smile every day.

Returns!

2011-10-01T00:41:00.000-07:00

About a week too late to take any photos of my last design of 2011... my Nikon has returned from the repair shop after a two month stay...

and now I wait to be paid enough to get the CPU lens I really want...

... but I am excited anyway and taking pictures of anything that gets in my way!

This time; Do not drop the camera!

"During" (That which comes between Before and After)

2011-09-28T01:40:00.000-07:00

When you look at it from the dog's perspective, my housemate and I spent Labor Day doing terrible mean things... First we cleaned out everything and moved all of our stuff into compact Tetris piles... mounds of hidden dog hair were removed.

Carpets were covered in plastic... the whole house smelled of paint...

At least there were awesome people in the house all weekend... I think DeWalt was pretty happy with that. The only bad thing was that they were helping Adam and I upturn the entire place...

Adam found a wee bit of mold behind his bed.

So... he replaced the wall...

We had grilled shish-kabobs... food was a temporary relief for the hound... but still, this trial was exhausting.

In addition to the fresh paint, my carpenter/welder/accidental designer housemate made a new gate for the front. We claimed new yard much like the British Empire... I think we need a flag, but the gate is a good start.

I think it might be a bit much for a little in-law apartment but it's rather fantastic and our land-lady (who did pay for the steel) thinks it is beyond awesome...

We steam cleaned the carpets before moving the furniture back into place... a further insult.

Not to worry, DeWalt has forgiven us and the house is mostly back in order. "After" photos should be taken, but I've been so busy I haven't done it yet... it's all a little mundane but I'll put the after shots up later on anyway.

Dear Mr. Sinatra...

2011-09-24T13:41:00.001-07:00

This is from a 1946 edition of "Screen Guide" magazine.

Español frase del dia...

2011-09-18T10:45:00.000-07:00

Best of Spell

2011-09-08T14:39:00.000-07:00

I have seen so many different ways to misspell my name... this is by far my favorite.

I've got this nasty habit of saving little scraps of paper if I think they're funny or have some sort of sentiment attached to them... I think putting them online will allow me to simply throw them in the trash like a normal non-hoarding type person.

A weekend of paint. Happy Labor day...

2011-09-05T18:43:00.000-07:00

My housemate and I have spent all of labour day weekend painting and cleaning our entire apartment. Right now we're at the end of a long day of painting and I'm waiting on steam cleaned carpet to dry before I can move anything into my room. I'm thinking about cleaning more... wishing that all of our stuff would just teleport into place. I'll show actual progression soon... meanwhile I wish I had a chair to sit on.

Flickr...

2011-09-02T14:42:00.000-07:00

Just an FYI, I'm digitizing my research in hopes that
1. I can dump a few tons of old magazines and
2. I don't have to cry as they dissentigrate because of old age...

I'll be opening an orginized research section on my Design website... soon-ish and I'm putting up back-ups on a new flickr account.

And now you know.

Heston 1 ; Hollywood remake 0

2011-09-02T00:01:00.000-07:00

Charlton Heston was a bit of a nut-bag but he did make some good movies;
A la; Omega Man, The Agony and the Ecstasy, Soylent Green, Ben Hur... and of course
Planet of the Apes... By "good" I do mean "Awesome".

I think that the supply and demand as shown by Amazon truly illustrates my point;

Heston's Apes released 1965; only 7 copies starting at $8

Hollywood remake crap, released 2001: nobody wants, starting at 42 cents

Seriously Hollywood, give us some rough edges, give us some story telling, give us Charlton pounding the sands cursing those damn dirty apes. Polished special effects don't make people like movies. Also just so you know, if you try to remake Soylent Green with some schmuck like Tom Cruise, I will find you, tie you to a chair in front of a giant television and make you watch nothing but Jar-Jar Binks scenes from Star Wars Phantom Menace until you scream out in pain and your eyes are too sore to blink.
Thanks so Much.

Fail blog...

2011-09-01T12:14:00.000-07:00

Stole this from my friend Nick...

(Seen in Vancouver, Canada)

A sewing question?

2011-09-01T01:53:00.000-07:00

There is a question I hear all the time... the question really is "would you sew this thing for me because I have no idea of what I am doing?" Unfortunately this question usually is posed as a series of circuitous questions that make me crazy.
Example; "I was wondering about this cute skirt I bought... I'd just a wee bit small and I was wondering if it would be possible to make it bigger..."
To which I answer " I suppose it would depend on if there is any seam allowance inside"
Although really the person asking wants me to say "I don't know, perhaps you should bring this glorious skirt in so that I can sew it for you!"
Inevitably the answer I give is followed up by something like " I just don't know how you do it... I have a hard time with buttons"

Which reinforces the fact that a simple alteration like letting seams out would be far beyond the asker's scope... Why ask stupid questions like this? Do you go up to your plumber and ask "gee, I'm thinking about installing a new sink in my bathroom but I just don't know how to make the water go through the pipes..." or do you mention to your chiropractor friend that you're thinking about readjusting your spine but can't quite figure out which vertebrae to crack...?

Tip #1; just because your grandmother could do this task does not mean it is easy. Don't act like it's something you can just pick up if you only had five minutes and the slightest desire to. It is insulting to me and to your grandmother and you know it's not true... go practice sewing some buttons.

I just want to tell those who seem to think that I live to sew things and am dying to help with all sewing related problems, that in fact this is how I make my living. I am a highly trained specialist and it has taken me over ten years to be able to sew as well as I do. Sure I'll explain to you exactly how to alter whatever you want... but don't expect me to take pity on you because you're clueless and cheap. If you want me to sew something, just ask me. I suggest you bribe me with money, food or whiskey... possibly all three. Even with the lack of money, food, or whiskey I think that someone just asking for help is better than them hoping to entice me to volunteer... it just irritates me to no end.

Say What?

2011-08-20T18:51:00.000-07:00

"It's kind of amateur, but I think that's Okay!"
--Overheard at a Bad show, seen recently.

Yes indeed 'amateur', I think this show was written by the same creative genius who adapted the Pinocchio I performed in summer camp at age 7. Did I think it was 'Okay'? ... let's just say I will have to go through life not knowing the conclusion of this masterwork. I will just have to imagine they ended with a gripping rendition of the song I recall singing in an inflatable swimming hoop...

...By the sea, by the sea, looking out to sea

I see sea, you see sea, sea is what we see...

Bahnhof der Kunst

2011-08-16T01:53:00.000-07:00

I walked into a building in San Francisco today that made me think about this art gallery Alex and I visited in Berlin... It was tall and filled with odd noises... the building in SF is a ferry building turned into a chocolate factory and has a sparseness coupled with a randomness of objects that took me across the globe in a flash...

I recall finding parts of this museum that was once a train station and wondering if we had accidentally left the museum portion of the building. After a few minutes wandering in dimly lit hallway you turn a corner and find something strange hung on the wall with a plaque and suddenly you find that you're ok...

In retrospect I really like the sense of bewilderment that this building gives you, it is an experience in itself, like wandering the woods and finding discarded treasure.

Sadly we were not allowed to wander through the chocolate factory. I'm sure the oompa loompas would not have approved such activity.

Brevity/sketchy

2011-08-14T02:03:00.000-07:00

Tonight I managed to reserve time to go and draw! There's a fun live model "anti-art" school thing that happens all over the country called "Dr.Sketchy's" and models are usually burlesque (costumed) models... perfect for me. They call in all different body types and costumes... plus it is all very low key and no pressure.

This was the first time I've ever drawn from a live model (or at least one who knew they were my model) so I was pretty psyched to be able to do it. I got through arts high school And earned a BFA in costume design without ever having a life drawing class... it's a rather sad gap in my education.

Brevity/recovery

2011-08-07T16:02:00.000-07:00

Post Tech (a rather rushed tech full of 12-16hour days) I am left with a disaster of a shop, a car and a house... I am left with that burnt feeling and still work keeps coming, life barely slows down. Spending the whole weekend cleaning, purging, organizing... bowing out of a canoe trip in order to try and get my feet under me before the next push gets intense.

A day with extra pith

2011-07-17T10:30:00.000-07:00

Woke up this Sunday morning to the sounds of a jackhammer after only four? five? hours of sleep... opened up the ruby red grapefruit I was planning on eating this morning to find it all pith (and not vaguely ruby)... I've never seen such a sad grapefruit and I went to college in Ohio. Now I'm stumbling around trying to get my head straight... so much to do and yet no juice... so sad that my breakfast is looking like the metaphor for my week.

Yellow

2011-07-11T01:05:00.000-07:00

That which covers all
Conquers souls
fills lungs
teaches eyeballs to fear

That which is inescapable and
Unbelievable.
Only truly understood by those
who have lived
under the tyranny,
of pine.

--My dear loved ones currently living in the pollen, I salute you.

Daily Minutes...

2011-07-08T00:42:00.000-07:00

12am; load car for following day of fittings, trunk full, arrange blanket covering costumes in back seat to look more like a sleeping (or dead) body than costumes (hope that nobody breaks into car to hassle the corpse).
1:30ish; sleep?

6:02am; wake sharply with the feeling of having slept in and missed all appointments
6:11; convince self to go back to sleep
8:06; wake up again... decide that it's close enough to 7 hours of sleep to get up.
8:40; oatmeal
10:11; crap! I woke up two hours early and I'm already 15 min behind...

10:35; arrive at rental shop (located next to the methadone clinic) to find that nobody is answering the door.
10:40; make friends with locals
10:48; get into the rental shop
12:15pm; leave rental shop with a new 50lbs of costumes, haul it all back to the car stepping over puddles of unknown origins

12:30; arrive at Shakespeare offices...
1:55; haul another 40lbs of costumes to car
2:15; chicken wrap lunch

2:55; arrive at rehearsal hall and try to pull costumes from the bottom of the pile out into the top
3:30; still sorting fittings on the sidewalk
4:00; haul all costumes up to rehearsal hall in three batches
4:35; finished hauling
4:36; get asked if I "need any help"

5:30-7:50 fittings...
7:55; realize I've left a good 15lbs of costumes I was supposed to fit today in my f***g studio (rearrange fittings for later)
8:02; meeting with director
8:35; hurredly gather everything back into piles and have stage management and director help shove everything into car

9:15; left over pasta and a tangerine (wait for theatre crowd to leave the street my shop is on)

10:17; meet my lovely friend Alisha who helped me reload ALL of the costumes back into the shop

10:45; re-sort costumes for returns and re-load car for following day

10:55; return home.

12:33am; decide to blog because sleep isn't coming any time soon...
Wired.
Can't sleep.

**exact times are mostly guess work with the exception of 1st wake up time and blog time.

$325.

2011-07-06T02:31:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time I lived in a two bedroom apartment all by myself. I could keep all of my work out of my bedroom and at the far end of the house. There was free heat and water and on sunny days the sunlight would stream in over my futon where I could nap between afternoon classes. The ceilings were quite high and the washer and dryer were free (although the basement they were in was rather creepy and gross)... I had a front and a back porch... all this for $325 a month.

Granted the down side of my apartment was that it was located in south west Ohio... Somedays while I am working in my bedroom and I find that all of my stuff is just all crammed together because there is no room to spread... and when I have to pay all of my utility bills and considerably more rent... I sigh a soft breath and miss my stupid Cincinnati apartment. Never again.

Brevity/shopping win

2011-07-02T02:01:00.000-07:00

See this handsome man in his suit? Yea, I bought him that. I love it when actors buy the costumes I find for them.

Brevity/creativity in progress

2011-06-22T01:04:00.000-07:00

I cannot reveal the full picture... but then that is the essence of where my latest show is right now. There are bits and bobs and we are working very hard to make them into a complete picture.

UPDATE:

How was the concert?

2011-06-13T03:39:00.000-07:00

A: It was amazing.

That is how this exchange is supposed to go right? It's like Q: How are you? A: I'm fine. It's a good way to ask a question that you don't really want an interesting answer to...

However; How was the U2 concert?
Why I am so glad you asked!

Last week I went to my third U2 concert. My first was in Louisville KY 2001, then in Oakland CA, 2005... Where to even begin about what it is like to attend a U2 concert? I suppose part of it is linked to the connection I have with their music. If you know me, you know that they are my favorite band and have been since about 1993. Are they my favorite band because their concerts are so special or are their concerts so special because they are my favorite band? I'd like to think that the two are not mutually exclusive.

The beauty of a U2 concert is unique. U2 is not just about the music. Each of the U2 shows I've been to, I've been far far in the back... they are usually a centimeter high from my perspective and yet they manage to make the place feel full. The use of multi-media as a fifth member of the band helps. This tour features a giant 360º LED screen that expands and changes height. The screen helps add elements that could not otherwise be achieved in mere reality. What other rock group could/would integrate astronauts in their rock show?

Astronaut Mark Kelly did this for Oakland (and probably other cities on the tour... but we went crazy when this came up)

What other group could/would take down the audience to discuss matters of humanitarian importance? I had no idea about the prisoners of conscience in Myanmar, now I do. Every show is a teaching opportunity for the band who spend a lot of their non-rock-band time in humanitarian efforts.

U2 will build you up, will play you the greatest song you can imagine (yes this is a biased opinion I know), but then they want you to think about your privilege, to think about the suffering in the world and to do something about it. Every show I see they are grateful for the crowd, grateful for their careers and mindful of others. Every show, they thank the audience for being there. They are not spoiled rock stars. At this concert Bono thanked us for our patience (we did wait an extra year to see this because of Bono's injury last summer, it has been two years since the tickets originally went on sale). Because of this thought provocation, every show is filled with happy, mindful and friendly people.

After the show, at least half of the Coliseum funneled back to BART (our rapid transit) in a sea of people... you will never see a happier mob in your life. At the end there were people keeping others from loosing keys, clearing the way for those on crutches, fun banter with strangers and no panicked pushing (gentle pushing maybe). In any other crowd I would probably have been fully freaked out.

I do get out to see concerts whenever I can, but there is nothing like a U2 show.

Photo Perspective

2011-06-13T02:29:00.000-07:00

I love looking at other people's vacation photos. I like the photos of tourists holding up the tower of Pisa, them standing with crazy hair and exhausted beaming smiles in front of the Eiffel Tower... Moreso I love seeing the photos of odd details. A friend of mine visited Versailles and took photos of the courtyard through the warped windows, another took amazing perspective shots of the Golden Gate Bridge from the base of the walk way...
When you are on vacation even iconic things can be new.

I love the odd detail shots; foreign toilets, supermarkets with funny brand names (An Aussie friend of mine thinks it is hilarious that we have "Drug Stores" in America). Some photos are taken with specific people from back home in mind "ooh take a photo of me in front of the puppet shop!", others are taken so as not to forget... so much information just slips away. I like the way these photos show the things that make you stop and gasp. The photos that prove that you saw "That famous building", that you were "There" all the while most of us are aware that this snap shot can never capture the feeling of standing there.

I hear that some people don't enjoy looking at other people's vacation photos. I contend that these people are looking at the wrong things. Most of us know what the Pyramids at Giza look like, but it's amazing to see the care of memory and the excitement of the visitor... it is the world anew and we are so blessed to have the ability to share it.

Sing it brother...

2011-06-05T23:29:00.000-07:00

"Sometimes you meet people who inspire you,
Sometimes you meet people you want to inspire,
and sometimes you just want to fucking stab yourself"
--Jamie Oliver on stubborn people.

Krakenhaus

2011-06-01T21:52:00.000-07:00

It is very possible that I will be the only person on Earth who will find the bit of photoshopping I did here to be funny.

It involves; Harry Potter, Jules Verne, knowing a few German words, and things that you see rather than what there is...
Trust me... it was hilarious in my head at the time.

Brevity/distraction

2011-05-21T21:36:00.000-07:00

Things that I need to buy;
1. Pants (old pants all too big)
2. Cell Phone (old phone is 5+ yrs old and starting to die)
3. Luggage (old luggage just about disintegrated traversing European cobblestones, but this can wait)
4. Postage Stamps (uh... you know because they don't take these things for free)
5. New Eye Liner (down to an inch nub)
6. oil change for the car

Things that I actually managed to purchase;
1. New headphones.

Yep. That's it. Shopping failure.

Apocalypse...

2011-05-21T02:27:00.000-07:00

So the Pope gets a phone call.

As the Bishop hands him the phone, he tells the Pope; "So I've got some good news and some bad news"

"What is is?" the Pope asks.

"Well the good news is that Jesus is back and he's on the line"

"That's amazing! Hand it over!"

"The bad news, sir, is that he's calling from Salt Lake City."

---ha ha ha---

Brevity/Eurydice

2011-05-20T21:01:00.000-07:00

Just opened two shows... next one is having fittings tomorrow... next after that needs to be designed in rough draft by Wednesday... sewing all of Sunday... oh yea tired.

Street Lights; Duetchland

2011-05-14T22:57:00.000-07:00

These two guys are what the walk/don't walk men look like in most of Germany (and in Prague as well)...

These two photos show what the walk/don't walk men look like in East Berlin...

They make me so happy. I Love the little Walk man with his Communist hat and jaunty gait... in fact most of Berlin loved the East Berlin version so much that since reunification he has moved West as well. There are still many of the boring walk/don't walk street lights but there is a lot of Berlin that uses the formerly Eastern version.

Never turn your back on the ocean...

2011-05-14T18:42:00.000-07:00

Yes... rip tide is dangerous... but this made me laugh anyways...

Brevity/Carmel

2011-05-14T11:56:00.000-07:00

Putting a show together in a week while the next three are fast on my heels... today I could go shopping for the next... but it is Saturday. This is the worst possible day to go shopping. This is the worst day to go to the aquarium... I think I will take a little time to read my novel and enjoy some coffee at the only decent coffee shop in town...Opening tonight. Huzzah.

I feel fine.

2011-05-06T01:03:00.000-07:00

Well, at least Armageddon had the good sense to wait until after my trip to see Alex.

(These billboards are up all over the place around the East Bay)

Side-effects

2011-05-03T00:05:00.000-07:00

*das Fenster (the Window)

Odd side effects I've been experiencing from my return (other than a cold that is keeping me down somewhat)
*a calm mind
*the ability to concentrate
*the occasional enjoyment of my work where I used to be irritated by it
*the drive to feed myself three times a day
*a lack of guilt when it's time to sleep

I wonder how long this will last. I think I need to travel more frequently...

*das Fenster shown above is from St.Vitus' Cathedral in Prague, this one was designed by Alfons Mucha

Memorial- Berlin

2011-04-30T22:25:00.000-07:00

The Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe, takes up over 4 acres of Berlin with over 2,000 concrete slabs (shaped like coffins) the grid is arranged in a sloping field so that when you walk from the street where they are flat with the ground, into the middle where they are far above your head you have a sense of sinking into it all. the slabs undulate slightly so that the sense of symmetry is never found.

Underneath the memorial is a "Place of Information" listing all names of known Holocaust victims.

A city of faces

2011-04-29T23:15:00.000-07:00

Everywhere you turn in the labyrinth that is Prague there is a sense of being watched,

door knobs, corners, columns... it seems like everything had a face

Does it bring comfort? Does it produce paranoia?

To have the very walls watching over your every move...

Czech words...

2011-04-25T11:32:00.000-07:00

Here is the extent of my new Czech vocabulary;
Ano- Yes
Ne- No
Dobre Den- Good Morning
Dobre Vecher - Good Evening
Prrosim - Please
Pardon - Pardon
Chesky - Czech
Angliky - English
Je Quee - Thank You
Yden - One
Pivo - Beer
Kava - Coffee

Not so very impressive considering I even got a language CD to work on before getting here... My new German vocab is much better... but then again it is oddly more familiar and much closer to English. Here in the Czech Republic I can read signs three times a day (like the words for exit and transfer) and they slide right out of my head like warm jell-o.

Easter Market Dancing...

2011-04-25T11:04:00.000-07:00

Geld*

2011-04-25T01:53:00.000-07:00

Look at how much money I have in my wallet today! Seriously though... what is this worth? 1200 Czech Krouna is worth about $72.

You see this;

The three coins here add up to 17 Krouna, which is currently about one US dollar. What can you buy in Prague with one US dollar? You can buy;
A Banana and a trip to the bathroom
OR
A single postage stamp (to be used within the Cz. Republic, outside postage is 21ck)
OR
well, honestly nothing much else (I've been looking)

The smallest bill here is a 100ck Bill which is the equivalent of aproximately $6. Most things here cost at least 100ck. Goulash; 99ck, Beer or Cola is 50ck, a full meal is closer to 300ck-500ck, ($20-$30). Sadly it is hard to find anything that is free to do... so I'm mostly walking around and doing the public transit sight seeing. I spent way too much money on a lack-luster concert last night... I hate obsessing over money like this, but I think that the main reason that the Czech Republic has not switched to the Euro is because then it would be horrendiously apparent at how grossly inflated their prices are compared to everybody else.

*Today's German word means Money... because I'm more interested in returning to Germany than to Bohemia I'm working on my German.

Currywurst-Berlin

2011-04-25T01:00:00.000-07:00

Berlin's specialty; Currywurst. It is like street food, very akin to the bacon wrapped hot dogs sold in San Francisco's Mission District. However most places are real establishments rather than hot dog carts... and they are all over the city. Some are more trust worthy than others.

First you get a bratwurst cooked in what is clearly very healthy grease;

Then they cut the bratwurst into smaller chunks, cover it in curry powder, serve with fries and your choice of ketsup or Mayo... the dish is to be eaten with a tiny plastic fork while standing up.

It was rather good, and I felt full for pretty much most of the day. I'm sure there was more than a full meal's worth of calories involved.

nahoru*

2011-04-23T13:48:00.000-07:00

Prague is maddening and beautiful and intense. The whole place comes with a sort of claustrophobia and it always requires you look Up Up UP! There is just about every type of architecture here and all jumbled together like a mad architect's dream world, streets converge randomly and others just go on and on, up and up with nowhere to turn. It is Easter weekend and warm so it is also crushed full of people local and not. I kept finding that I could not just take pictures becuase I would be taking them in little pieces only to try and tape together later. There is no room to take it all in and the whole city seems to crush in on you. Some buildings have intense Neo-Gothic decorations but are only five or ten feet from the next building. This video is of the old town square, one of the largest spaces by far.

*Today's Czech word of the day means "Up"
--although frankly I am still struggling with "thank you" and "I don't speak Czech"

Verloren*

2011-04-22T11:10:00.000-07:00

Crossing over the Czech border, a sense of panic grasps me. While we huddle together in a train nearly out of an old movie about British India (no people on the outside of the train, but just as packed inside) I realize that the announcements are no longer in German. Everything is suddenly in Czech. My only hope for understanding the announcements is from a Bavarian woman who barely speaks Czech or English, while I barely speak German. She tells me we need to transfer now because there is "a problem with China" or so I understand. The houses along the country side stop looking quaint and begin looking more and more like Baja California. Crumbling houses in need of repair, clotheslines hang on ruins, broken windows abound. I did not stop to take pictures. I quickly became so over-whealmed by the fact that we were not even hearing German (much less the occasional English or Italian that you get in Germany) that all sense left me and I just forgot everything but English and 'crazy monkey pointing'. Pils (as in Pilsner Beer) looks like Detroit after the apocolypse, I cannot believe this is a functioning train station and this is where we must transfer... I follow the crowd and cannot even tell what the word for 'platform' must be... worse yet I am looking for Platform 2 but they have written out the word for 2 rather than used the number.

I pray; God oh God please don't let me get stranded in Pils.

*German word of the day is Verloren; lost.

(this is not the station in Pils... this one actually looks a little less run down)

6:20am

2011-04-21T22:35:00.000-07:00

I missed my train to Prague. I went to the ticket booth to see what could be done... the woman at the counter apologized profusely that she could get me to my connection but from there out all of the buses are all booked. To get me to Nurnberg and then let me hope for a bus would cost 70Euro... Or I could get a direct route to Prague for 42Euro... Wait. What? That's what I wanted all along but couldn't get online for any price. Perhaps there is some secret about the glory of riding a bus for four hours that I am missing.

Ok then... so now we wait.

müde*

2011-04-21T01:06:00.000-07:00

It's my last day in Munich, my last day in Bavaria... what to do? Yesterday I saw the Residenz Palace of Ludwig (pronounced Ludvich) the second.... I'm pretty sure he was the second, and the Haus de Kunst, which was not as impressive as I was hoping for. I walked and walked and frankly tired myself down for little reward. The Residenz was indeed amazing, but everything after that I was running on nothing. Solo travel in a foreign language is already exhausting, to get lost and find that (although I wasn't so lost the first day) I was very glad I brought a compass. Up was down, in was out and I was mostly spinning round and round. I slept in today. I shall endeavor to stop and eat lunch today. I shall endeavor to walk as very little as possible. Stairs? No! I shall take the escalator and ride it, like an old person. I thought about taking another walking tour today but it looks like a lot of the information will be a repeat of my free tour and I'm not sure I want to walk for three hours at a clip. Today I sit and stroll.

The great question of the day; can I buck up for a real Bavarian style meal? It is mostly a plate full of meat. Salad on the side costs a full 5 Euro extra and most people don't get that... my stomach couldn't take it yesterday, partially because of the walking and partly because of all the cigarette smoke. In Berlin there wasn't so much smoking, but here there are vending machines everywhere and smokers everywhere, it turns my stomach and makes me ever so cranky. I hear that Prague is going to be worse in that aspect (Heaven help me).

*German word of the day means Tired

Munchen cover up

2011-04-20T14:27:00.000-07:00

You'll notice that the right side of this building looks a little odd... that is because it is all under construction. In Munich and also in Berlin all construction must cover the scaffolding with what the building is going to look like so as not to detract from the beauty of the city. I rather like it.

Let's play a game

2011-04-20T10:00:00.000-07:00

Who can guess what kind of building this is on and what the second from the right symbol means?

Dienstag

2011-04-20T00:52:00.000-07:00

Munich Calling

2011-04-19T00:31:00.000-07:00

Berlin was amazing.
Apologies for not updating... wi-fi was not easily available and I would rather spend time with Alex than with the internet so that is what I did. It is processing.
Berlin is complex and poetic.
Berlin was so much more than I expected and at times surprised me by being exactly what I expected... Perhaps at the end of the day when my feet are about to fall off I'll be ready to start talking about it.

When I got into Munich yesterday afternoon I took a train up into the English Gardens for a breath of fresh air.

I then walked South, counterintuitive since all of the water runs in the "wrong" direction by my perception. Somehow my sense of direction is not dictated by the direction that water flows and instead of being completely turned around by it's contrary actions I just felt that it was doing something unnatural. The air is oddly muggy and looking out over the meadow there is a faint white haze that turns everything into a pastel but is so subtle that it never looks like fog.
This is the place that Mozart makes so much sense. I put Eine Kline Nachtmusik on the ipod and it seemed like I was walking through a music video for Mozart. Everything smoves in time with his music.

Alex warned me about the air pressure, there is a name for it and I forgot it... something about a high pressure system that is unique to Bavaria, it gives you headaches and makes you feel sick... it does feel odd I must say I'm glad for the warning because otherwise I might think I was getting sick or old quickly... I walked and walked and my legs started to feel all wobbly... the English Garden is HUGE. Finally I wound up by civilization, the Haus du Kunst and the Subway... above the subway is this amazing building,

but at the moment I was so exhausted that I just looked up, took it in, took a picture and went to find my train back to the hostel. Today I will find out what it was. Now I am off to do the most touristy thing I can bear to do: the walking tour. Perhaps I will buck up and have a drink at the Hafbrauhaus but I'm not so sure... for now, adieu and good night to the West Coast, I am off to enjoy my Deinstag (Tuesday) and try to increase my German skills (eep).

An omonous trip to the summer palace.

2011-04-12T13:42:00.000-07:00

1^st Full Day in Berlin... I spent mostly outside of Berlin. We took the train to a small town just outside of Berlin called Potsdam to see the summer palace of Frederic the Great... and the less known side of the Brandenburg gate (not nearly as historically important or as pretty as the famous half).

There are many beautiful buildings that are either next to old crumbling communist buildings or that are next to (or part of) construction.

I vaguely remember seeing photos of this palace and the gazebo in an art history book, but it didn't make much of an impression. All of the buildings on the grounds are painted in this beautiful Naples Yellow (my favorite shade in my goash paints) and there are hundreds of sculptures all over the grounds. Every building is inspired by the Romans, or the “Orient”. Below you can see the palace vinyards (they grew a lot of the grapes behind glass so that they don't freeze.

At one point today the sky rather suddenly rumbled and turned a dark grey. Heavy cold rain burst and we ran for cover in a structure that I thought was rather squarely hideous, Alex thought it was “tasteful” . Artistic differences aside we both agreed that the gardener who continued to water the flowers in the middle of the downpour was hilarious.

Taking photos inside the palace (on the tour) was somewhat forbidden... so I kept the flash off and took a couple on the sly... I must try to find some photos of my favorite room. Most were decorated in gold fillagree and somewhat poorly done Rococo paintings (with the exception of two that I think were actual Watteau's) . The final room was decorated in carved cherry wood sculptures of over-sized flowers, parrots, monkeys and birds, all painted with full color. This final room was a guest room with a bed sitting in a wall niche. I wonder how creepy it could have been to wake up in the middle of the night to catch a carved monkey in the side of your vision.

Tomorrow we are going to a Bach concert... what else? We shall see... It's supposed to rain so probably something somewhat indoors.

Internet is somewhat slow, so photos will be a little sparse for a while... Plus, the Z button is where the Y should be... it's trippz.

2011-04-12T13:23:00.000-07:00

I've landed in Berlin. I spent nine hours in a plane from SFO to Paris in a somewhat disoriented state from rushing all morning and managing to get through security and gate check in with about twenty minutes to spare. Found myself on an AirFrance flight where although the flight attendants where all bilingual, my fellow passengers were mostly not. I wound up using my extensive knowledge of the French language, mostly gleaned from French cinema... perdone moi, excuse moi, misure, madam, un eau see vous play... oh yes I can say “excuse me I'd like a water” and point like a monkey just fine. As I got further and further into my book of choice I became sadly aware of how poorly written it was and I began to try and analyze the passengers around me. I had the fellow behind me who so badly wanted to be left alone and never have anyone ask him to move or have food or anything that involved moving... perhaps he was hung over or petrified of flying. I had the nice French couple next to me who I would talk to in English and dance like a monkey and they would in turn talk to me in French and dance like monkeys as well and somehow we could understand pretty well. The woman to the front and right of me I decided in my head was from a communist country. She was very concerned that she was being treated the same as everyone else and was constantly watching what the flight attendants were doing (as though they would forget to serve food or drinks to our side of the plane or that someone would get a better meal than the other). I tried to sleep but it was for naught. I just wound up sitting very still with my blanket on and my sleep mask on listening to the white noise around me.

We had a stop over in Charles De Gaulle airport where there were a lot of “Bonjour, perdone moi, oui, and un eau petit see vou plays” and that is about all I could manage... new stamp in the passport... and a wait to get on the next flight. CDG airport is beautiful, unless you are actually there. It was full of narrow passage ways and unclear sineage, also it was oppressively hot and humid. The plane ride had already tired me out and dessicated every cell in my body but CDG was a cigarette scented sauna.

Happily I landed in Berlin and my oldest and dearest friend was there waiting for me. There is nothing better than getting where you are going to be greeted by people you love.

Choosing travel companions

2011-04-02T23:29:00.000-07:00

It’s too soon to pack. I am packing in my head. Checklists scroll through… passport, check. Netbook, check. Power cords, check. Sweater, shirts, jeans (which jeans?) shoes (which shoes)… and more importantly what books shall I read on the plane? Today I decided on books, all unread from my bookshelf. I have three that I chose for different reasons. I wonder if you can guess any of them from their beginnings…

1. It was on a Sunday morning in the loveliest part of the spring. Georg Bendemann, a young merchant sat in his room on the second floor of one of the low, lightly built houses that extend along the river in a long line, differing, if at all, only in height and coloration.

2.”We need you to kill a man.”

This stranger glanced nervously around us. I feel that a crowded restaurant is no place for such talk as a high noise level gives only limited privacy.

3. They found the body in a tuft of floating forest a half-day’s swim from ringsol six. Daven was the first to see it, Rache the first to recognize it for what it was.

This week has been insanely busy and next week will likely be the same. My next day off may yet be the day that I am sitting on a plane, unavailable, isolated, packed with only my books to keep me company for my eighteen hour journey.

small differences...

2011-03-25T12:25:00.000-07:00

If you didn't know, I spent two years at a public high school and two years at an arts high school...

This is what kids wore to prom from one of those schools

and this is what we wore to the other...

I wore a black jumpsuit...
Hmm can you guess which is which?

Antici.... (say it!) .... pation.

2011-03-20T00:11:00.000-07:00

Berlin...

Munich...

Prague...

(oh yes, guest rooms/hostels/hotels and trains are booked... travel blog coming in 21 days)

Fog

2011-03-18T19:22:00.000-07:00

THE fog comes
on little cat feet.

It sits looking
over harbor and city
on silent haunches
and then moves on.
---Carl Sandberg

Brevity/a Sunday

2011-03-13T18:43:00.000-07:00

My internet decided to die at home, but the dog and I held it together... we went to the park and got caught in the downpour. I then drug him into a torture chamber filled with soap and water, followed by an apologetic pig's ear. The damp morning was soon followed by sewing nasty packing blankets into set covers... sadly it is taking longer than I would hope for... I would of course hope for the magical ability to wiggle my nose and have them assemble themselves, but somehow that is not working.
Dog is tired of this joint.

Me too.
I'm going home to make myself something warm and garlic-y for this cold rainy Sunday.
Peace out.

The fashion police open up a whole new can of worms.

2011-03-10T23:34:00.000-08:00

(This is not a post about fashion. This is a post about wearing clothes that fit you; physically, personally and mentally)

"Don't be judgemental"
"There are all kinds of beauty"
"Don't feign to be so superior"!

How DARE I judge on appearance?!

I am a sartorial sociologist. All day, on most days, I observe people and think about what they are wearing, why they are wearing it, what they look like in it, how they might feel wearing it, how long they've had it, where they might have obtained it. I consider the fashion trends and designers that came together in one look, or perhaps the methods of construction, draping, aging... the cultural background of the person, aesthetics, color choices... That's right, you feel like you're being watched? It's me. (I am Jacques Cousteau and you are all beautiful little fishes)

I do not make these observations out of a catty need to criticize. It is a main reason that I am a costume designer and not a fashion designer. I am interested in variety, tatters, textures, odd choices. I like mud and grit and the bizarre turns of human experience. If I were a fashion designer I would be more interested in form than in context. If you know me, you know I am no fashionista.

In my profession I interact with people on a rather intimate level. My first encounter with an actor will usually begin with me and a tape measure. It is the truth teller. It is the enemy. Everyone has some preconceived idea of what they should be or what they were and it seldom is the same as reality. People also have horrible preconceived ideas of what "size X" should look like (so wrong!). My first interactions involve collecting information, reassuring egos and discussing or dodging deep insecurities.

Consequent interactions are a negotiation of my vision of the play and the actor's bravery to go along with it and trust me (or not). I will make them look as much like their character as possible, sometimes that means making them more beautiful, and sometimes it means making them look old, sick, slovenly... purposefully so.

Throughout this process I learn about everyone's body issues. Everyone has them. Most people (women more often than men) think that "Nobody makes jeans for me". You would not believe how many times in a week I can hear "I just have a weird body". Maybe 5% of the time I meet someone who truly has a "weird body" with such odd proportions I double check measurements. (Not just actors either, I do alterations for every day people who may not be scrutinized as often as actors are but still carry around the same insecurities.)

Fun Fact I learned in fashion school; Every fashion brand hires "fit models" of a variety of sizes in what that brand deems to be 'ideal proportions'. These are the people that are used to check how a clothing line will look on 'real people', not just runway models. Only 8% of the population qualifies to be a fit model. That is why Nothing fits you off the rack, that's why tailoring is your friend. It also accounts for the popularity of stretchy clothes, because they have a lot more forgiveness in fit.

The trouble with the standardization of beauty is that most people are walking around feeling like they are the weird one. They do not see the great variety of people because they never have to shop for other bodies. No it's "just me". Worse yet are the people who think that they are nothing special, that they shouldn't care about their appearance because they can never look like what 'beauty' is supposed to be.

There are many things that are more important than appearance but from what I have observed in both others and in myself; when we say that appearance does not matter at all, it is giving up on the possibility of being beautiful. It is throwing your hands in the air and saying "eh F** it!"

(hang on I'm coming to my point )

My glib denouncement of stretch pants was the tip of the iceberg in what is a somewhat shallow blog (Postcards isn't a forum, it's a quick hello/goodbye... usually).

Rejecting fashion and the current mode of beauty is fine. That is not a problem. That is having an aesthetic and a will. The problem is accepting fashion and beauty as it is fed to you and letting its unattainable nature wound your self worth.

Why wear clothes that don't fit? From my experience it is from a sense of 'should-be's. You think you should be a size 8, but can't handle the scrutiny of the fitting room mirror and the truth that you are a size 12... this is how muffin-top happens. This is when the shopper falls in love with a pair of pants that will fit "if I just lose 5 pounds"
(because I can't have beautiful things until I look the way I imagine I should)
--I'm sorry I keep using examples of fat, there are also people in denial of breast size, belly size, lack of hips, excess butt, flabby arms, long torso, short arms, age issues... such a kaleidoscope of human variety... I just relate to the weight issue first so that is what I am using--

What I am Offended by are the people (and yes, mostly women) who live in denial. I want to scream at the women who look at the magazine and shop for what they want to look like rather than what they do look like. I want to hold an intervention for the women who leave the house without looking in the mirror, because it's too painful, because it's too much work, because "I'm not worth it, don't look at me"
... because I have been guilty of All of these sins.

Why should you not wear these fashions that do not look good on you? Because you can look good, you can do better. If you think you look good in fat rolls and see-through pant/tights, we have a difference of opinion. From my experience such fashion mishaps are not because the wearer thinks they actually look good in these clothes, rather because they think the clothes look good and that they themselves are therefore inconsequential.

Is that judgmental? Probably.

--I'd like to thank Lizz for the provocative link that prompted this post.

brevity/vomit

2011-03-09T16:55:00.000-08:00

I don't know what the dog had eaten for Fat Tuesday, but by the morning it was on the living-room carpet. The dog stood hungover, nose to the door, pleading in a silent chant; "open the door... open the door... just open the damn door."

--yea the day got better. The dog got better... I may however use this morning's vomit in my great American novel someday.

Hide your shame... Please.

2011-03-08T00:16:00.000-08:00

(this blog post is rated PG-13 for strong language)

I've got to say it... what's with all of the spandex/ lycra/ skin tight clothes? Tights are Not pants.

I look around and it's sometimes like living in a nudist colony with spray paint. Sometimes someone can really pull it off with a great body that will look good in anything, but people please! Fat people Please! Hell, moderately fat people... Please! Just say no to the skin tight from head to toe look.

New Rules;

1. no super skinny jeans may be manufactured in a size larger than 10 (and for the record, my fat ass is in this category. Nothing personal, It's just wrong) Gentlemen larger than a 34 waist (and I mean really you think you're a 32 but pull out a tape measure...) no skinny jeans for you!

2. Super-mini skirts over your nasty celulite showing (and obviously too small) tights do not fool us. They do not make you look cooler or thinner, I don't care if you are 18 years old... step away from the mini skirt.

3. If you can look down and see the freckles through your clothes, turn around and put some damn pants on!

4. Rule; If we can see the fat above and below your bra or waistband; Your clothes are TOO SMALL. Go buy a bra with a bigger band size, a shirt in the next size up, pants with a larger waist ... and those Spanx that you think are helping so much... they are just squishing your fat up.

If you follow these simple rules, we will all be happier.
Thank You.

brevity/sewing pains

2011-03-03T23:38:00.000-08:00

I have one more day working as a stitcher. The hourly wage sometimes feels luxurious (as opposed to the flat fee payment I often get). The lack of responsibility is refreshing... and yet it grows old quickly.
Sitting in bad chairs doing repetitive work takes its toll on the body. Daily trips to the gym help and yet my right knee aches from the up and down and side to side motions required to operate the machine. My back hurts from the lack of support, my left shoulder has developed a large knot that has become persistent and my ass is getting sore sooner and sooner in the day. I really don't know how people do this all year. I especially pity the stitchers who have (and do) have to do this work in cramped, dark sweat shops. Ouch. I am ready to get back to my other jobs.

Hangar One

2011-02-28T00:55:00.000-08:00

Last week my best friend came up and spent three days with me. The wet chill of weather diverted us from our original plan to go hike in the redwoods. Instead we went to a distillery on Alameda island.

Just outside of the parking lot you can see the lot where the Mythbusters frequently destroy cars, and blow up buses. I chose to keep my camera dry so you'll need to take my word on this.

Inside there is a small room that works as the gift shop and the booth where you can sign up for tasting their liquors. St.George distillers sells vodkas, brandy, Whiskey (a very American Bourbon), absinthe, liquors that included raspberry, a tea-bergamot (that was oddly fantastic), and pear.

There was a "tour" that basically walked us to all of two locations while a tour guide spoke very softly and I have no idea of what he said... it was at least free and interesting to take a gander at the interior.

Instinct.

2011-02-28T00:22:00.000-08:00

This is what a professional hunter looks like... sleek, tuned, successful...

This is what my dog looks like...

When he started pouncing on the hole like this I had to film it. I know I've seen documentaries with foxes yipping just like this as well. He actually takes large chunks of the hole and moves it away with his mouth. Sometimes he will station himself with his nose in the hole, still as can be waiting for his prey to emerge.

There was no kill today but, shockingly, he has been successful with this technique before.

Ok... now I promise to hold off on the dog posts for a while. Thanks for indulging me.

Palate Cleanse...

2011-02-25T01:14:00.000-08:00

I caught the dog sleeping on the futon...

Really I have nothing to say about it but Awwww!

--still working in a dull haze of sewing induced brain frizz.

--Weather update; The weather experts claim that it may snow at sea level (San Francisco/Oakland/Berkeley) on Saturday (it would be the first time since 1976 if you don't count the 3mm that SF got last year for an hour). If such an occurrence happens I expect city wide panic. I doubt we own a single snow plow in Alameda or SF county... all I ask is that the insanity happens when I don't have to go anywhere.

Stay tuned.

February this and that.

2011-02-22T01:28:00.000-08:00

February can be a cold mistress. Often it is a month of left over ramen and the eternal job search. It is the slowest time of year in the Theatre. This year I've found a sewing job that has happily kept me occupied and earning money. It has however left my blog rather sparse.

I don't particularly like sewing. I am good at sewing, it pays the bills but it is not a passion of mine. It doesn't keep my brain moving in the way that design does.

When I get bored with sewing I start to drift into imagining that I am sewing myself a train ticket in Germany, I am making myself a nice cup of coffee on a foggy morning in Munich... I imagine Munich will have fog, I have no idea really but I love it so much in San Francisco that I imagine all nice places must have a little fog in the morning. I listen to audiobooks... I turn inward and muddle around in my head, but it's a difficult place to take photos of. I promise to crawl out of my own brain soon and I will bring the blog when I do. Meanwhile, patience.

Today the new album by Adele came out and I downloaded it as soon as possible. She won me over on this one with the tiny desk concert she did for NPR. Amazing.

a conversation about Drugs

2011-01-26T16:37:00.000-08:00

Healthcare discussions make me angry. The discussions about 'reform' are taking place with professional politicians who used to be lawyers or businessmen and for the most part have never had a problem getting healthcare or paying for treatments. It all makes me so angry I don't even want to open up my opinions for discussion here. However despite that, I felt the need to share this conversation that two of my favorite vloggers have been having this week...
Meet Hank;

and meet his brother John;

Capitalism is good for many things, but allowing your health or sickness be the determining factor of someone else's profit is dangerous.

Happy Robbie Burns Day!!

2011-01-25T00:00:00.001-08:00

To A Kiss

Humid seal of soft affections,

Tend'rest pledge of future bliss,

Dearest tie of young connections,

Love's first snow-drop, virgin kiss.

Speaking silence, dumb confession,

Passion's birth, and infants' play,

Dove-like fondness, chaste concession,

Glowing dawn of brighter day.

Sorrowing joy, adieu's last action,

Ling'ring lips, -- no more to join!

What words can ever speak affection

Thrilling and sincere as thine!

---Robert Burns

And... a song that I was not aware Robbie Burns wrote the lyrics to; Auld Lang Syne. This guy doesn't use the same tune we usually mumble at New Years, but it's kind of pretty;

Wanderlust

2011-01-21T00:40:00.000-08:00

Consider this a warning. I have a vacation planned. Or perhaps I should say I have a plane ticket to Germany and I cannot stop planning. I am as indecisive as my little sister at Halloween; "I want to be a cowgirl, no a ballerina, no a monster, a witch, a ballerina who wears cowboy boots!!!!...."

For some reason, in my brain, getting off of the continent instantly makes the rest of the world easy access. In my head it's like America has this big bubble over it and once you break free you're in "the rest of the world" and this lovely not America place has magic trains that cost a dollar and suddenly it is possible to travel from Berlin to Jerusalem via Hyderabad in just a matter of hours. Logically I know this is not true. A Eurorail pass costs a few hundred dollars depending on how many countries you want to see and the duration of your trip. A train takes eight hours to get from Berlin to Munich. Of course considering the train from San Francisco takes twelve hours to get to Los Angeles, it makes it all seem so close!

Right now I pour over travel books, I consult Anthony Bourdain, I somehow try to decide where and how long to stay while trying to keep the magic fairy train out of my head. If I keep my travels on a schedule and only go to a handful of cities I can keep this trip somewhat affordable. I must remember that it takes time to really see a place so taking my time is better than trying to just zoom past it all. It is so tempting to get the super expensive all access train pass and think that once I get to Munich, I should just hop on down to Italy and from there Spain is right next door... and hell, if I'm in Spain I really ought to travel south for just a little bit to get to Morocco... there's just so much I've never seen. For once I can say it is good I am traveling on a used shoestring budget and cannot possibly get the super train pass. I am forced to think this through and plan carefully.

I've got nearly three months left and somehow need to find a way to make myself chill out. All of this possibility keeps me up far too late at night.

Slightly enhanced

2011-01-16T20:38:00.000-08:00

Brevity/twilight

2011-01-16T18:15:00.000-08:00

Went to work... saw a run through... watched the sunset...

Meh.

2011-01-14T21:54:00.000-08:00

It is just one of those weeks. Go on world, just add injury to insult.

Cake rant

2011-01-13T11:44:00.000-08:00

Recently two links have popped up on my Facebook feed... both related to the propaganda of dieting. It's odd how there seems to be stock photography about diets that I never really noticed. It's all aimed at women and it seems to assume that women all have similar eating problems... clearly it is cake. It is chocolate. It is eating that one delicious thing that Every woman loves... we are offered cake at every turn and find we must resist. Did you not notice this?

Oh OH! it is so hard to turn the corner and not find a cake. You know what would cheer me up? It's salad. Salad is apparently the funniest meal of the day. It's awesome. And you can eat it alone because well, men do not think salad is as funny as we do...

I know there are other stock photography examples out there... the woman lifting weights on the beach, the happy yoga on a rock... on a rock! Have you ever done yoga on top of a bolder? As soon as you try a new balance pose and fall out of it at best you're going to scrape up your feet, and at worst you're going to fall off.

The larger problem in all of this is the way that it simplifies problems. You are fat because of cake. If you're not eating cake... well there is no real solution for you but you should laugh over some salad and lift some weights. You should eat some salad and lift weights, but most diet magazines are not going to tell you why. They are also not going to tell you that fast food, and soda are making you fat because then Mickey D's is going to sue them. They will tell you the "healthier" foods to buy at the fast food joints. They are not going to tell you that you need to eat less, because that's not profitable. They talk a lot about things to buy but not quantity to consume.

They aren't going to tell you how to really understand your nutritional needs... you need to eat more energy bars and take more special diet pills and spend Money! Even the FDA has its hands tied by food lobbyists about what they can or cannot tell you (check out Food Politics by Marion Nestle). How is it fitness magazines are going to push past that? "Make healthier choices" is the creed but when you get down to it they clearly think that cake is the most delicious thing on earth... yes they even try to tell you to eat yogurt instead of food... knowing that yogurt (at least diet yogurt) is kind of vile.

(You'll be back on cake and fat in no time) You need to stay frustrated and continue to pick up their diet magazines with slightly repackaged advice that never really gets you where you want to be... just closer when you are very very good.

...and when you resist cake. Of course.

Frosty Garner Valley...

2011-01-13T00:00:00.000-08:00

Ice that dusts the trees can make you stop

in the middle of the road

and gasp.

Photos are rather insufficient.

Brevity

2011-01-11T16:26:00.000-08:00

Fighting a cold today,
Sewing at home where it is warm,
sleeping soon I hope...

The camera that I've been piecing together from ebay auctions came in and my friend lent me his lens to make sure it works... I dare say it takes some rather stunning images... I hope I can get equally satisfying results from the lenses that I actually got. The only downside to this baby is that the automatic flash is stuck and will not turn off, leaving me without any special features... but still not so shabby.

Mother of invention

2011-01-09T11:27:00.000-08:00

Traditionally this phrase is that "Necessity is the mother of invention" Perhaps Accident is more like Invention's flaky Aunt. Many times the slip of the brush or the scissors at an inopportune time leads me to make "design choices" I would not otherwise make, but it seems to me that most invention is the result of desperation or of carefully planned out experimentation to fill needs...

What do you think? Could Accident be a mother to Invention?

Yo?

2011-01-03T01:21:00.000-08:00

Ok this is a little random and just odd enough that I had to make a vid of it to share...

I tried the CD in a CD player... it's Billy Ocean disguised as Yo-Yo Ma... weird.

Happy New Year

2011-01-01T00:01:00.000-08:00

A new year brings with it a plethora of resolutions that most people expect to fail at. I say Nay! Improvement is ongoing, resolutions should happen all year, the human spirit should be ever climbing to a greater goal at all times... January is a good time for reflection, to sit and think "where am I going?" "what would I like to be doing?" "Who do I want to be?". It is a time to look into the mirror and have a good harsh discussion with yourself.

Onwards and upwards.

This year I intend to learn about how to manage my money better, I am going to read one book by a ~~Republican~~ Conservative (a non-fiction book, Orson Scott Card does not count),I will fill the massive HP Lovecraft gap in my education by reading some, I am going to improve my foreign language skills (Spanish, Hebrew AND German), I will be a more positive person when I can, I will find time to go swimming this next summer... yes soon I will be closer to being closer to attempting 'perfection'

May your year bring you happy adventures, improvements, brilliant ideas and new exciting goals!

What are your next steps towards the fractal that is never quite perfection? What Conservative book should I read that I will not feel the urge to purge upon?

Fortune cookie say...

2010-12-30T00:34:00.000-08:00

Welcome to my new occasional feature. Real rambles inspired by fortune cookies.

Actions do speak louder than... words...
and what are "talks" but many words shuttled to and fro...

It can be a daily task to decipher if words are truth, lies, or subtext. What is it we say about each other or ourselves and how much of that is true or perceived or blatantly false? In costuming we try to show what a person thinks of themselves or their job or their station in life through their clothes. Do clothes speak louder than words? Does posture?
What about the priorities we make? When we make time to pause and talk to each other, or help, or don't, what does that say about our priorities?
When there are no words, action is all that there is.
Does a lack of words speak louder than a lack of action?

Balloon!

2010-12-29T00:15:00.000-08:00

I saw this at the San Diego Wild Animal Park... sometimes the light is just perfect for random photos...